A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
