even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
