I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
