we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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