real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
