But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I love you.
Bad choice
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
