i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
