this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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