Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
