This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
