I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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