if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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