My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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