I cannot find my penis.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Randomize
