sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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