I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
