I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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