Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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