Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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