You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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