all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Randomize
