Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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