Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
