Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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