Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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