Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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