I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Randomize