and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
