Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
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