we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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