Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
