Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
