how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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