I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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