Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
