What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
