..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
