Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
she told me i tasted like america
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
