i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
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