You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
honey bunches of taint.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize