i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
