did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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