hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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