He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
