Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
