if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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