words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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