i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
