Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Randomize