I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
not ubering you a puppy
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
